Monday, May 16, 2011

i still cant make my own decision

hai........its been awhile since my last post i guest.........today i'm kind of tired a bit coz working during the day.........after maghrib pray, i having a chit chat with my appa n omma...........i was talking about having short courses in kolej komuniti...........then appa babbling at mesaying that kind of courses is not for me..........n so on.....

the chit chat starting to change like its going to be a quarrel....then i realize......its better for me to be silence........soo i silence till the end..........till my appa stop talking........its not that i dont understand him.......its just that i wanna try n wisg to make my own decision..........i really wanna do that.........coz what i do from the beginning until now is follow what ever my parents desicions is..........i still remember till now....

during my 3rd grade........i n 2 of my friend had been chosen to what they soo call 'melangkau' coz i pass the PTS examination...........i still remember that time..........i'm just 9 years old girl, need to sign the form of confirmation regarding to the offer......i really dont want to 'melangkau'......coz i will leave my dear friend that same age as me........n i need to be with students that older than me........but my parents forcing me to sign it with my eyes crying.......its was so sad when i recall that memory back.........

during my form 3, my parents ask me to change school..........n again......i cant make my own decision..........i dont want too coz i really love that school.......i feel comfort with it....but coz i always have health problems, the want me to transfer..........that also a sad moment.......if time cant be repeated, i dont wanna change my school at that time.....well, that is the past, what else can i say.....huhuhu

after the SPM, i got 2 offer to continue my study.......1st is the accounting matriculation in kmpk....2nd is the economic foundation in UIAM.......i wanna choose the uiam coz that i really aim for.......n i dont know whats wrong.........my dad force me to choose the 1st offer..........as the reason is because he want me to finish early.........well, that me who gonna go for study not him.....why cant i choose for my self????.......coz he is my dad, so i just follow him.......

when i wanna further my degree, i wanna take a course that i like.......because i like to cook, so i wanna choose a course that related to it as example the culinary.........BUT.......my dad against me........he want me to take a business@entrepreneurship course..........n that is what i take now.......degree in entrepreneurship..........there a time when i'm tension with my study, i feel like i wanna stop study.........coz i feel like this is not my choices.......everything that i do do is for my parents....for my dad......

i have register for a short courses in a college but my dad dont want me to go there coz he want me to attend a seminar...........ish why cant i make my own decision??.....oo daddy......dont make me like this.....coz it will become my habit to always depend on your decision........i'm know that i'm still young.....but cant you at least give me opportunity to make my own decision???

i maybe can be patient for this........but if it comes to the part of choosing my life partner, i'm sorry dad...that is the last thing that i will not follow........i can follow everything you wanna me to....but not about my life partner..............syukur, till now he still dont ask anything about that.........i wish there will be no enforcement from my dad about that.......

#am i that bad????

2 comments:

  1. sik mok org kenalMay 16, 2011 at 11:01 PM

    i dunno bout u but at the age of 23,,i finally realized that every time i disobeyed my parents, things will turn bad in the end.

    i mean every time..

    so the moral of the story is=
    first,
    sebolehnya dgrlah kata2 ibu bapa anda kerana ada keberkatan pd perbuatn itu.

    second,
    dipetik dari= http://id-id.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=166808730018251

    Di dalam al-Quran, Allah SWT dengan tegas menjelaskan peranan dan tanggungjawab anak terhadap kedua ibu bapa, di mana Allah SWT menyuruh agar anak-anak sentiasa taat dan patuh kepada ibu bapa dengan sentiasa berbuat baik kepada keduanya dan apabila berbicara dengan mereka hendaklah dengan menggunakan bahasa yang lembut, seperti firman-Nya yang bermaksud, “…dan Tuhanmu telah perintahkan supaya engkau tidak menyembah melainkan kepada-Nya semata-mata, dan hendaklah engkau berbuat baik kepada ibu bapa. Jika salah seorang dari keduanya atau kedua-duanya sekali sampai kepada umur tua dalam jagaan dan peliharaanmu maka janganlah engkau berkata kepada mereka (sebarang perkataan kasar) sekalipun perkataan ‘Ah’, dan janganlah engkau menengking menyergah mereka, tetapi katakanlah kepada mereka perkataan yang mulia (yang bersopan santun ).” (Surah al- Isra’ ayat 23)

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  2. fikir jak apa yang terbaik utk ktk.. slow talk ngan bapak tak..:)ok.. chill!^^

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